I'd long heard stories about Trader Joe's zealots. You know, those Joe Junkies who couldn't visit their Aunt Mildred without picking up 40 pounds of cashews "while they were in the area." Or the ones who'd make a two-hour pilgrimage to the store every so often. It all seemed a bit far-fetched before a TJ's existed here. Now I understand.

Since Trader Joe's festive opening two weeks ago, I've been there a bunch. As I like to imagine it, the store's employees call me Trader Jon. While the TJ's is great for foodies, it's even better for Forksters who like their food frugal, fun and fresh.

Trader Joe's is deliciously cheap, and they do it without those annoying discount cards. I've never liked scanning my info, knowing that the data from my shopping trip is going straight to Dick Cheney's database. (Just kidding, Dick!)

The California-based food seller doesn't employ those keychain clogging cards for good reason: It doesn't have sales. Instead, the store just keeps all of its prices pretty low. Works for me.

Who can argue with a pound of almonds for $4.49? And tofu is cheap -- $1.29 -- as processed soy beans should be. Even the few national brands Trader Joe's carries sell for less there. I'm no extravagant shopper, but my average item cost in three visits was $2.28!

In addition to low prices, the store offers Joevotees a boatload of choices. Do you prefer cheddar from Vermont, New York or Wisconsin? Which of the 12 varieties of bagged cashews would you like? TJ's offers 31 chocolate-covered things, including pistachios and edamame. Note to Spoonstress: This doesn't bode well for keeping my shopping runs under an hour.

Another slowing factor: Shopping at Trader Joe's is enjoyable. The store pumps in '80s hits from Bananarama, the Talking Heads and the Stray Cats. And TJ's offers a higher quality free sample than most grocers. It's as if they've said, "You're serving cheese and crackers? Well, we've got hot entrees!" On successive visits, I enjoyed fettuccine alfredo, fettuccine with mushrooms and apple pie.

The store has upgraded coffee sampling, too. They've shifted from sipping to swigging, offering a whopping 8-ounce cup! Let me remind you whippersnappers that a regular Coke bottle used to be that size (before I was born). Overheard in the store: A wife telling her husband, "I think we should just go already." I completely empathized with the 50-ish man when he grunted, "I'm enjoying myself."

Trader Joe's cereal aisle is another strong suit. Organic Honey Macadamia Grainfest caught my eye. I figured anything with macadamia nuts was a solid bet at the aloha-centric store. Plus, I was excited about hosting a Grainfest at my breakfast table. I'm not sure it was "fest"-worthy, but it was better than most cereals.

Yet Grainfest pales in comparison to Mango Passion Granola. Let's just say I'm passionate about that cereal. With its freeze-dried mango bits doing a healthy Lucky Charms impression, that granola gets me out of bed in the morning.

The store's frozen delights get me out of bed in the evening (kidding!). The abundance of prepared food seems to be one of the store's big draws based on hearsay and aisle traffic.

Joe and his pals Trader Jose, Trader Giotto and Trader Joe-San provide a great variety of options. All of which are cheap and most of which are tasty -- for something that's been frozen.

I had to try the Mandarin Orange Chicken after shoppers and employees alike recommended it as TJ's ultimate frozen meal. I found it to be a passable General Gao's Chicken, with plenty of goopy sauce. I wish it was more Mandarin and less Orange.

For me, though, Chicken Chile Verde Burritos embody Trader Joe's strengths and, yes, weaknesses. They're zesty, high-quality and reasonable (two for $2.99). Real hunks of chicken squirt from a burrito filled with flavorful green sauce. But why do two come packaged together?

That bunching reminds me of my first, second and third gripe with the store: produce. With frozen food, this bunching isn't much of an issue, but the store's insistence on packaging perishable produce in multiple packs can cause food waste. And don't get me started on that topic (see www.wastedfood.com).

Trader Joe's sells very few loose produce items -- seven by my count. If you want a pear, you have to buy a bag of ten. While that isn't unpearable for large families, it's a real Trader blow here at the Forkquarters. It limits consumers' choice and creates more packaging trash.

Even though Trader Joe's doesn't aim to be shoppers' regular grocery store, they're oh so close to pulling it off. And oh do I wish they had a produce department where I could get a head, not a bag, of lettuce.

The lack of unpackaged foods extends through much of Trader Joe's. There's no deli, no butcher or seafood counters. But since I don't usually call on these services much, their absence at TJ's isn't a deal breaker. And to be honest, the lack of health and household goods feels liberating. But I can imagine many chafe at the lone option -- a house brand -- for toilet paper.

Another Trader Joe's weak point is the bread aisle. The loaves that I felt -- and I felt a lot, folks -- were really hard. And that includes the Soft White Bread and the Soft 10 Grain Bread. (The awesome Quinoa Bread was the lone exception.) I'm all for cutting preservatives, but not if it gives me loaves and buns of steel. Can we compromise on just a few preservatives?

Sometimes the store gets carried away, variety-wise. I was intrigued when I saw Tangerine Juice next to the O.J. After the first sip, though, I realized why I hadn't ever heard of tangerine juice. Ditto for Banana Granola Bars.

One final complaint -- the aisles aren't marked that well, some labels are hard to find and some items lacked labels altogether. These gripes are minor, though. In the end, there's only one label for me: a Joeficionado.